Exactly one year from now I got my cancer diagnose. This year has passed so quickly in the way that it feels like yesterday I was sat in front of the doctor trying to understand that my body was sick. But in the same way time has gone by quite slowly when things have been rough.
I am now one year older and a little bit wiser perhaps? Yes, I must say that this year has taught me a lot about life and how precious it is. I don’t really have a whole other perspective on things (like some people get going through hard stuff), but I am trying to grasp moments to enjoy and to live life in the moment the best I can.
It is difficult to explain how very grateful I am to have got this “extra” time in life. Sometimes I think like that, if I would have lived about 20-25 (?) years ago, I probably would not have survived this cancer.
Looking back on all the treatments and side effects etc I now feel like; it was not that hard, but I do NOT want to do it again.
I guess I have been lucky in the way that I did not feel that poorly. Yes, I was tired and felt a bit sick at times, but the other side effects was OK to handle (stomach problems, mouth blisters, hair loss, travels to Linköping, horrible taste in my mouth, nerves going crazy etc) That was not difficult. The hard part came later, when everything was done. Waiting for the results was the most difficult part of it all.
I am a very positive person that has kept my spirit up during the treatments, but in the end my positive energy was running on low speed. Even though I did not feel great in my mind, I STILL went back to school and continued my studies. That is something that I am really proud for doing!
Now I am feeling great and life continues. I enjoy spending time with family, friends and our cats. I will start a new job in august and I sometimes have to pinch my arm to make sure I am not dreaming that this life is true.
Thank you.
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